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Target Group	Relationship Status	The Problem	Possible VOW Solutions
Engaged	Jared: 26 Ashley: 25 Engaged but have not set a date for the wedding.	The In-Laws Ashley’s parents think that Jared has no future and they’re pressuring her to break it off.	Create a Family Map we define 25 types of couple or family relationships The 25 types or patterns are based on combining five levels of closeness and flexibility.
Has Kids	Eric: 22 Shantel: 23 Both work at a restaurant. They’ve been dating for a year. Now they have a 3 month old baby.	Conflict of Goals She wants to go back to school and get a degree. He isn’t interested in school anymore and is unsure about the future.	1. Set time/place for discussion 2. Define the problem 3. How each contribute to problem 4. Brainstorm for solutions 5. Evaluate possible solutions 6. Agree on one solution to try
Cohabiting	Dale: 34 Kristy: 29 Have been together 6 years and have a 4 year old. She just found out that she is pregnant.	Conflict / Fighting She wants to get married and is troubled by the fact that he he gets angry when she wants to talk about it.	Work on Assertiveness skills. This is the time to ask for what you want & need. Eliminating the assumption that their minds can be read.
Married	Bobby: 35 Trish: 29 Married 7 years both focused mainly on their own careers.	Financial Issues The problem is that they have been planning to have children. He is worried about the financial burden, but he still wants to buy a boat.	The first step in reducing the amount of conflict regarding finances is to discuss and decide on your short-term and long - term financial goals.
Over 50	Sam: 53 Phyllis: 50 Married 25 years and they just sent off their youngest child to college.	Communication Breakdown They are wondering “who’s this person living in my house.” Now that the kids are gone the have to get to know each other again.	Communication skills that will increase your intimacy 1. Look for the good in your spouse or partner. 2. Praise them as much as possible. 3. Take time to listen to each other. 4. Listen to understand not judge

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Funding for this project was provided by the United States Department of Health and Human Services, Administration for Children and Families, Grant: #90FE0091. Any opinions, findings, and conclusions or recommendations expressed in this material are those of the author(s) and do not necessarily reflect the views of the United States Department of Health and Human Services, Administration for Children and Families.